One may feel depressed because it seems the whole world is against him.  The  boss works his behind off and shows no appreciation.  Co-workers and friends back-stab or driving him nuts.  He seems to run into obstacles wherever he moves.  Nothing seems to go his way. He is neither a violent nor sports type person, so he cannot grab a gun to shot or do boxing.  There is no channel to vent his frustration and anger. 

Upon the recommendation of a good pal, this depressed person consults a psychologist.  The psychologist is happy to offer him a battery of psychological tests and customize a “therapy plan” of 6- 10+ counselling sessions.

During the sessions, the depressed dude will spill out his pet peeves.  The psychologist will sugar-coat the client’s craps and throw it back to him.  He may realize that it is either his own stupidity that he is depressed OR it is nobody’s fault to be depressed OR simple get a life and think positive.

Somehow our depressed dude feels relieved and happy again, largely due to the opportunity to find someone listening to his pet peeves.  But he becomes depressed again when he is billed a few thousand dollars by the psychologist.

In Southern China, there is a service that can offer similar or better results for the price of a MacDonald Value Meal.

The Chinese call people who backstab or obstruct you or whoever make your life miserable as “mean people” or “little people” (xiao-ren小人).  There are “beating up mean people ritual” (打小人) services for people who feel that they are being rejected, slighted, bullied and etc. by other people.  These services are mostly provided by older women or grannies.

In Hong Kong, beneath a flyover near the Times Square, there are some grannies practicing “Beating Mean People” ritual for HK$40 (US$ 5) per beating.  You do not even need to raise your finger.  The grannie will do all the “beating”.  This service include:

A.  ALL THE PAPERWORK (joss papers)
— a big yellow talisman that includes clemency orders for your bad deeds or sins.
— a red nobleman talisman to attract helpful people to you.
— joss paper money to please the deities and spirits
— a paper tiger (symbolizes “mean people“)
— a paper imprinted with a human shape (represents the mean people, for beating)
— a plea to heaven about beating the mean people
— incense and candle sticks

B.  SERVICES

— you can specify the name of a person to be beaten or just a “blanket beating” of all the mean people around you (no extra charge).

— your “mean people” are represented by a piece of rectangular paper with a human shape imprinted.  It will be put on the surface of a brick.  The grannie will use a woman high heel shoe to strike the paper human from head to toes while chanting something like these:

” Hit the head of  you mean people, so you can’t breathe.
  Hit the hands of you mean people, so  you can’t hold your pen.
  Hit the feet of you mean people, so you can’t wear shoes….”

You may add your special punishment to your mean people.  But this ritual rarely curses or beats people to death.

— after a thorough beating, the paper mean person will be “engulfed” (wrapped inside) by a paper tiger and burnt.

— a quick divination will be done with the portable altar nearby by throwing two piece of wood (3 possible combinations) to see if the deity “approves” of the beating.  If the answer is “no“, grannie will throw a pinch of rice and burn some papers and redo the divination until getting deity’s approval.  Most of the time, two tries are enough.  Now you will feel great because even the deity or heaven has approved of your beating.

— all the remaining “paperwork” (joss paper) is lighted and sway around your body to “cleanse” or remove  negative energies away.  At the same time, grannie will chant, “Auspiciousness and prosperity for you!”  You feel lighter, relieved and happy.

— throw the burning paper into a red tin can to finish burning (ritual is done)

This is probably the best deal in mental health service.  For US$ 5, you get your sins forgiven, your mean people beaten with heaven’s approval, spiritual cleansing and blessed with good luck and fortune.  No wonder Hong Kong’s Tourist Association was so surprised to sell 2000 “Beating Mean People Tour” packages in Taiwan within a day or two in last May.
 
“Ken, does this really work?”

Two years ago, I took an Amercian Feng Shui pal to the grannie and beaten his “mean people”.  He told me later that he had no business for two months.  He was dumbfounded that most of his clients are “mean people”.  Mean people are sometimes the people who sign your paycheck, so be careful when you try to “beat” them.

In my “Daoist Talismans for Feng Shui and Blessing” course, I have a more “humane” ritual that does the same thing without beating up people.  It focuses on bringing in helpful mentors into one’s life instead.  The ritual works so well that it is reported on the TV in South America.

Ken Lai

“Practical Date-Selection Methods (incl. XKDG) w/ 12 hr. video
“Practical Imperial Qi-men-Dun-Jia” w/ 12 hr. video
“Daoist Talismans for Feng Shui & Blessing” v.2 w/ 24 hr video
“Practical Door Feng Shui for Wealth” w/ 3 hr. video
“4-Pillars Forecasting Bootcamp” with 12 hr. video
http://www.kenlaifengshui.com/
http://kenlaifengshui.blogspot.com/

Advertisements